Top 10 of 2009

All of the news organizations are doing their top 10 stories of the year, here are mine.

1. Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Thomas being diagnosed with cancer to start the year is the top story this year, and not only because it was so shocking and hard, but because it taught us more than we would have ever known about the power of prayer, faith, medicine, and our resilience as a family unit.

2. Coeur d'Alene Roadtrip. After being tied to Rexburg the whole, long winter and spring for chemo, and into early summer for radiation, Thomas and Caley had the goal to get out of town at long last. Coeur d'Alene was their dream destination, and we decided to join them and make it into a big family trip. Though we were missing Adam and Kyle, the rest of us jumped in the lake, floated down the river, golfed, and celebrated with our gracious North Idaho kinfolk. A spectacular Tubb's Hill cliff diving video featuring Steven can be seen on Veronica's blog.

3. Idaho's Youth Governor. Steven was elected at the Hi-Y convention to represent Idaho as Governor for the 2009-2010 school year, and took a trip in June to Catholic University in Washington D.C. to convene with all of the other national Youth Governors. He also met with Idaho Senators Risch and Crapo. He will preside over the state Hi-Y convention in April.

4. The Hicks's of Kentucky. Somebody had to be the first to do it, the first Park kid to move all far-off away from home. Veronica and Kyle moved to Louisville at the end of August, and Kerry drove back with them and Kyle's dad and a Penske moving van. We miss them, but not right now, because they are here for a long Christmas visit!

5. KSL Internship. Channel 5 in Salt Lake City is the big time, big market, big news station where Marisa completed her Broadcasting internship fall semester of 2009. Bruce and Deenie like her, and so do we. She got good experience in news reporting and producing, and also freeway rush hour driving from Provo to SLC every Tuesday and Thursday.

6. State PTA Convention. In April, Kerry and Emily drove with me to Coeur d'Alene where I presented a workshop and handed out state awards for the PTA Reflections program. It was fun to see family there, and also the woodwork from the Sherman Ave. home we grew up in. I'm in my 2nd year as Idaho PTA Cultural Arts chairperson.

7. St. George Marathon #7. It was a great weekend for a family trip to St. George in October, where I ran my 7th marathon in 7 hours and a minute. Not such a good time as far as running goes, but I wasn't last, I got a medal, and we had a great rental home for the weekend with all but the Kentucky kids there. Infinity pools are fun. Adam finding me between mile 24 and 25 with a bottle of Dasani is a vision I still see in my sleep.

8. Girl's Camp. I was a cook for the Stake, Emily was there, and we had a fun week at Camp Cumorah. Like PTA, this is a 2 year job, so I get to do it again in 2010. I learned that cooking for a lot of people can be fun, but it takes all day, even with my friend Tami in the kitchen too.

9. The Economy. Since all of the major news outlets will have this in their top 10 list, I thought I should too. Kerry's company was not immune to the economic downturn, but thankfully he survived each of the many rounds of layoffs over the course of the year. Many of his co-workers were not so fortunate.

10. Mr. & Mrs. Torres. There weren't any Park weddings this year, but there was a Motola cousin wedding, and we got to travel to the gorgeous Manti Temple with many of our family members from near and far to see Erik sealed to Corinna. This was of course another opportunity for the "girl cousins arranged by hair color" photograph series.

Runners up: Emily became a teenager, BHS boys won state in Football at Moscow with Steven in attendance, another midnight showing of Harry Potter with the Porter-Parks, concerts galore attended by various Parks - Celine Dion, Taylor Swift, David Archuleta - and Huey Lewis at the EISF, knee surgery for both of Kerry's parents and rotator cuff surgery for his Mom (too many curve-balls?), Adam made 2 trips to NYC to see friends, ball games, and famous landmarks, Steven was Jr. Prom royalty, Emily played her first flute solo in Sacrament meeting, Kerry spent a few Saturdays as the chase car for some hang-gliders, and Emily caught some really big fish.

Linger Longer

We got a new hot water heater, 80 gallons. Steven and Kerry hauled it downstairs, and then the next night we had the missionaries for dinner and they made the mistake of asking if there was anything they could do to help our family...so they got to help haul the old heater up the stairs and out into the truck!

But now, we can linger longer in the shower with plenty of hot water for all. It's a good thing.

To Whom

Whom Shall I Serve

Whom shall I serve,
what inner strength have I to give?
To others is the way I live
An evidence that I care?

A pillar of light
Young Joseph in a grove of trees
Found out when he was on his knees
His Father in Heaven cares

And with God
Nothing is impossible
But you must reach and take his hand
With God
Nothing is impossible
Those who have ears to hear
Will understand

The blind could see
The lame man could walk away
And life will change from night to day
When they know that someone cares
When they know someone cares
When they know someone cares

Twenty Six Point Two

It's time to go to bed, the night before the marathon. I am filled with self-doubt and fear and the familiar "what have I done" feeling. It only gets worse on the bus ride 26 miles out of town. It's been a while since I've done this (3 years) so me and my knees are that much older and wiser too.

I just wanted to type in here what the teachers sang to me on Wednesday at the surprise assembly. It was so sweet, unexpected, surprising, and very humbling to have my whole school - staff and students - honor me in this way. So I really, REALLY, have to finish, get my medal, and make them proud. I will think of this song as I run. Kay Sorensen was the composer...you know what tune it's sung to.

while they sang, 26 different children came up and gave me a shoe shaped charm, with one little runner girl for the .2 at the end. I'm wearing that runner girl on my race number - 8012 - tomorrow!

Twenty-six miles to go
Just twenty six miles to go
I'm starting fresh,
I'll do my best
Just twenty-six miles to go.

Twenty-five miles to go
Just twenty-five miles to go
This is a breeze, I'll finish with ease
Just twenty-five miles to go!

Twenty miles to go
Just twenty miles to go
Look around
I'm covering ground
Just twenty miles to go!

Fifteen miles to go
Just fifteen miles to go
My knees are sore
but I can do more
Just fifteen miles to go!

Ten tough miles to go
Just ten tough miles to go
I'm more than half way
and starting to pray
Just ten tough miles to go!

Five aching miles to go
Just five aching miles to go
The sweat pours down
Will I drown?
Just five aching miles to go

Four hurtful miles to go
Just four hurtful miles to go
I'm breathing hard
my brain is jarred
Just four hurtful miles to go.

Three painful miles to go
Just three painful miles to go
I need a drink
I think I stink
Just three painful miles to go

Two endless miles to go
Just two endless miles to go
Why did I commit
to take this trip?
Just two endless miles to go!

One killer mile to go
Just one killer mile to go
The finish line
is almost mine
Just one killer mile to go!

Look at me, look what I did
Look at me, look what I did!
I ran the race
but not in last place
Hey, when can I do this again?

A Perfect Brightness

My blog began, at the suggestion of my sister Kerri, as a way to record my feelings about Thomas having been recently diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma. It turned out that many of my feelings on that matter were too tender, spiritual, and deeply personal to blog about. But my blog is named "a perfect brightness of hope" because of this talk by Elder Uchtdorf.

New Year's Eve 2008 was quite a dark day for me, I think I spent the whole day googling "Hodgkin's Lymphoma" and "chemotherapy", and while the prognosis seemed good, there were a lot of frighteningly stark statistics available at the websites I visited. As the clock struck midnight, I just stood there and cried on Kerry's shoulders, unwilling and unable to welcome in the new year which would bring ocologists and chemo into our vocabulary.

I didn't want any of my kids, especially not Thomas and Caley, to see my fears and sorrow, and think that maybe I didn't have faith, because I did. Early on the morning of New Year's Day, I found the conference talk by Elder Uchtdorf entitled "The Infinite Power of Hope." I decided that would be my personal mission statement of the year. I printed it off, and have read it many times this past year. Out of the darkness of New Year's Eve came the brightness of New Year's Day. Out of the darkness of winter came the hopeful spring, and then the warm summer. As a family, we celebrated the end of cancer treatments for our brother and son by jumping in Coeur d'Alene lake on a perfectly bright July day.

Elder Uchtdorf was sustained as an apostle at October Conference, as we watched from out hotel room in St. George, following the marathon in 2004. Five years later, we are going back to the marathon, and I expect that St. George is going to be perfectly bright, once again.

Do The Right Thing

Not long ago we learned that local soldier Randy Neff had been killed in Afghanistan. He was a classmate of Marisa’s, from elementary through High School, graduating in 2006. Flags continue to be flown at half staff in the city, as they have ever since word was received, and on Monday they were lowered all across the state of Idaho.
Marisa’s 5th grade year was probably the worst public school class of any of my children ever, and with 6 kids that’s a lot of classes. I had never requested a teacher before, I never saw the need, and this was my 4th child in 5th grade, so there had already been over 40 opportunities to do so. I found out that year why parents request, and it often has nothing to do with the teacher. It has to do with the other students in the class. Pretty much all of the other happy, well-adjusted children’s parents had requested the other 5th grade teacher that year, and unfortunately the principal let this happen, and the two classes were very unbalanced. Marisa’s class had only 4 girls and about 20 rowdy boys. Everywhere she went that year whether it was P.E., Music, or the Library, her class was told they were the worst class that specialist teacher had ever seen. Often they didn’t even get to participate in the activity, spending the whole 30 minutes being lectured by a teacher at their wit’s end. Sometimes the teacher would say “this is the worst class I’ve ever seen – except you Marisa” which was nice but still didn’t give her a chance for happy class participation in a game of volleyball. She was in GT, so once a week she got to leave her classroom and learn some things. I imagine her classroom teacher was frustrated and overwhelmed with this class. Perhaps that’s why when Randy Neff was being bullied, she believed the bullies when they said, for example, he was breaking his own pencils and blaming it on them. I didn’t know this until this past week, but the time finally came in that class when Randy’s mother came to school and confronted the class and the teacher. The teacher asked the class if what Randy had been telling her was true, that he was being bullied by these boys. Nobody would say anything, they were probably either afraid or they were doing the bullying. But Marisa spoke up, and she told the truth, and was the only one who was brave enough to stand up for the bullied boy. I’m proud of her little 10 year old self for doing that all those years ago.
Seven years later, when she was a senior in High School, she got called out of class one day. It was Randy Neff, and he wanted to thank her for being the only one to stand up for him and tell the truth back in 5th grade. I’m proud of him for doing that too.
You never know when something you do is going to have an effect on someone, enough that they will remember it for years, and enough that they feel the need to tell you “thank you” seven years later.
I looked in Marisa’s yearbook to find a photo of the boy who was killed by a roadside bomb half a world away. Under his photo is his senior quote which reads “People can hurt you only if you let them”.

Where I Run

When I'm running, I don't have a camera. So tonight Kerry & Emily went on a bike ride with me & the camera around the greenbelt so I could show you where I spend a lot of time lately. By mid-August, I will have run to Butte, so to speak.

Mama Mia, it's about time!

I ran with an mp3 player for the first time ever today. Revolutionary!


In the past, I've had this Sony armband radio, with 10 preset stations, so I could switch from station to station til I found a good song to run to. But you know, sometimes there's just not a good song being broadcast anywhere in range, and it can be a little unwieldy to run with an entire radio on your arm. I haven't used it at all this summer, and I have missed running with music.

Today at the end of my 5.31 miles, I felt like the time had flown by and for the first time this summer I felt like I could have actually run a little further than I had planned on going. And it was even a Monday! Emily had helped me upload what little music we could quickly find on this computer: Taylor Swift, ABBA, and couple of random Tim McGraw songs. (This does not count the 850,000 songs that Steven has on here that I have never heard of/could never run to.) By the next time I run, I will have found the rest of the music I know I have around here - all of my favorite running songs that will help get me down the road, and around the greenbelt, as the mileage picks up on the way to St. George.

Running to the radio, you only ever hear current pop and country hits, so this was the first time I think I ever ran to ABBA. It was good fun, but the best beats-per-minute song turned out to be that Tim McGraw song with the BBQ stain on his white T-shirt. That song got me through the last quarter mile, and also made me think that this coming labor day weekend will be the one when Steven is 17.

The first marathon I trained for in 2001, the song that was played most often was Drops of Jupiter, so that always reminds me of running. I'll be needing that one, as well as the most played song of marathon training 2002, Kelly Clarkson - Miss Independent. Then there was the summer of Sheryl Crow. My playlist will have to include Legs by ZZ Top, Runnin' on Empty by Jackson Browne, and Foo Fighters, Learn to Fly (the song that was playing as I ran the morning Adam flew home from his mission.) More will occur to me. Songs that are slower I still like, if doubletime turns out to be a good running pace. Feel free to suggest songs to me that suggest running to you!

I'm really excited as I train to feel myself getting faster and stronger each day, even if by most standards I am neither fast nor strong. The other day the manager of the Eastern Idaho State Fair was walking around the lake, and I as ran past she said "Good for you!" to me. Yeah, Doris, good for me!

Twentynine

It's amazing how fast 29 years goes by! I am trying to think of something memorable Kerry and I can do today for our anniversary - after watching Emily's softball game tonight that is. Maybe we could head on over to Twentynine Palms, except I have to shop for groceries for Stake Girl's camp this weekend, so a trip will have to wait. Not sure a Marine Base is the best place for an anniversary trip anyway.

Here is a list of memorable Anniversaries past.

1st anniversary - we had a newborn, Adam was just 12 days old. We couldn't bear to leave him for even an hour so...we had our anniversary at Kerry's parent's house where they "babysat" Adam inside and we BBQ'd steaks outside on their back porch.

4th anniversary - we had another new baby, Veronica was just 3 mos old, and we lived in Wymount Terrace. Our good friends and neighbors, Steve and Mari Roberts, volunteered cheerfully to babysit for free so we could go out to dinner and a movie. The movie? Ghostbusters!

10th anniversary - We lived in Rexburg, and had 4 little kids. We took them to Grandma and Grandpa Park's for the day and went golfing at Jefferson Hills golf course and then out to dinner.

11th or 12th anniversary - June 25th that year was the Rexburg Relay For Life event, and Kerry had signed us up to walk a certain amount of time on the Basic American Foods team. We walked the same number of laps as the number of years we had been married. I think it was 12.

15th anniversary - It was a Sunday, so we just had a nice dinner with our little kids - no Emily yet - then went on a peaceful stroll around Smith Park. Our last anniversary in Rexburg.

24th anniversary - Simon & Garfunkle concert in Salt Lake city - the kids are now old enough to just leave them without grandparents or babysitters. We had a nice room at the Marriott downtown. Our seats were up pretty high, but it was a great concert.

25th anniversary - Maui! We had a condo right on Napili Bay. We snorkeled every day, went running up to the airport on the hill, took the road to Hana, climbed a volcano - and spent June 25th on a sunset dinner cruise. Perfect! There was a newlywed couple on our cruise, still in their wedding attire. We told them we would meet them back there in 25 years for their 25th anniversary and our 50th.

Usually we'll go out to dinner, or sometimes the Temple on our anniversary. Plans for our 30th anniversary next year are to go to Canada! We haven't been there since our wedding trip, it's just not on the way to anywhere. This time though, I think we will need a passport.

Purple Shirt

Since it's past midnight now...this is the day that is the last day of radiation. It's also the day of the Relay for Life. Thomas and Caley came down for the survivor's dinner tonight, and he got his official purple shirt. I think he looks super cool in purple.

Crossroads of the West

Today was fun, Steven flew for the first time. He is the Youth Governor for Idaho for 2010, and today began the national conference for all youth governors in Washington D.C. He had to be at the airport in Salt Lake by 6 a.m. in order to get to D.C. by this afternoon for orientation. Kerry got some photos of the governor going through security. The interesting thing is that today Veronica and Kyle flew home from their annual Outer Banks trip, so they were also in the Salt Lake airport, and probably crossed paths with Steven somewhere over the midwest. They had the same connections - Chicago departing and Denver returning.

And then, because it truly is the crossroads of the west, Marisa's friend Doug from the wiffleball game was also flying into SLC this morning returning from our favorite destination, HNL. I wouldn't be surprised if Sarah was also in the airport today, since SLC is her home base for her airline job.

It's also JC and Norma's 60th anniversary today, so truly momentous is this date in Park family travel history. 10 years ago today we were in Yellowstone for their 50th anniversary, when Adam was a brand new high school graduate who was still 17, the age Steven is now.

We had some time for a Sunday drive on the way home, so we stopped by the Utah Capitol Bldg. where Emily learned that her lot in life as the youngest child when all of the older children are gone is to get dragged around by her aged parents looking for things like the Mormon_Meteor. It wasn't there, it was vandalized and moved from the Capitol, so instead we found the Mormon Battalion monument and the name of Great, great, great (great, great?) Grandpa James Pollock Park from whence the J comes for all of the boys middle names.
.

Happy Birthday Dad!

Today is Dad's 80th birthday. Or I guess, now that he has passed away, it is the 80th anniversary of his birth? Whatever, it's still his birthday and so in honor, I have this photo-booth strip that was taken in 1965, just before we moved to Idaho from California. I believe that this was my "school photo" for that year because I was the only one of my siblings too young for a school photo, at the age of 4 1/2. It's a treasure, this photo, surviving all these many years.

I was named after my dad - Ronna/Ronald and so then I went right ahead and named Veronica after both of us. (What she does with the "ron" suffix/prefix/infix is up to her.)

So you see, I had no bangs, my hair was blonde, and he was trying to make me say something because I really don't think I had that much of an overbite!

We always used to celebrate Dad and Mom's birthdays together, since hers is tomorrow, but now I guess Mom gets her own day and cake.

Today Emily will play her first flute solo in Sacrament meeting. I remember playing for my dad, and that he always thought I was wonderful. So at first, I was going to have Emily play a song that her Grandpa loved, but then we found "Stairway to Lasting Joy" in the old, orange Sing With Me primary songbook, which is a song Emily's dad loves. It should be a great memory, since we meet in the old 1st Ward building where Kerry attended primary long ago. I'm thankful for all of my happy childhood memories, and hope that my own kids have made some happy memories too.

Happy birthday daddy, wherever you are!

Creativity

Tonight was the Regional Reflections Awards ceremony, and it was fun because I didn't have to be in charge. I was just the State lady who got to come up on stage and hand out 5 awards, one of which was to Caley's little brother, so that was particularly fun. It got me thinking about the things which have been created by my 6 children over the years for the Reflections contest. It began with Adam in Kindergarten in West Jordan, and a dragon or dinosaur he drew for Reflections that year. We have the raining money photo, and Thomas in a suit with a handful of cash. Emily drew a picture of a "different kind of hero" which was the theme that year, of 2 missionaries. Adam did a collage once of a gameboy, when the theme was "If I had a wish." So in that round about way, I came to find this talk by Dieter Uchtdorf on creating, which is a talk from last year's Women's conference, and also this nicely done video. On behalf of all of the little artists, composers, and authors who created something for a PTA competition, or a card for Grandma, or a picture to hang on my fridge, I am posting this video here.

I Am Legend

I don't think that I have ever spent the night alone in my house before, in my lifetime. There has always been somebody else here. The past 2 nights and 3 days, it's been eery, just me and Scout the skittish cat, and no other human life forms. I don't mind solitude, and it's not like I haven't had any contact (Emily has texted me 20 or 30 times.) But I think I'm ready for people to come home now. I'm starting to talk to Scout, more than usual. Which reminds me, I miss Buttercup. And people. And voices (that aren't in my head!)

Table for Siete

It's fun to have married kids.We got to spend this Valentine's Day with the Parks and the Hicks... and Emily. Macho burrito, macho fun!

-22

When I woke up, igoogle said it was -22 here. I think we get to have a snow day if it's -20. Now it's just -18 though, and I guess that's warm enough for little children to stand in the dark waiting for buses. Cold hands (feet, noses and ears) warm heart, I guess.

Some links to some things that might be helpful

I'm just kind of collecting websites about scholarships, grants, and help available and I'll be adding them here, so I can find them again later.

http://cancerforcollege.org/Scholarship_Info.html

http://www.mariolemieux.org/

http://imtooyoungforthis.org/community/i2y-money.shtml

http://www.leukemia-lymphoma.org/all_page?item_id=4599

In Sickness and in Health

They both thought that she would be the first one to spend any time in the hospital, and then just for something fun like a new baby. I thought that nobody in my little family would ever get cancer because we have no family history, and no riskiness. Since Thomas was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma, it has been a very long three weeks, including a couple of surgeries, a chemotherapy treatment, an ER visit, and a hospital stay. But you can't argue with a 100 percent cure rate. We have all learned a lot about PET scans, neutropenia, and ABVD. Something I already knew was how wonderful Caley is, how brave Thomas is, and how much my children love each other. A lot of people this week thought that the presidential inauguration was the thing to watch, but I saw something even better when a prayer was answered in front of my eyes.

Unfortunable

Today (since we have the late Church schedule, and I have time to think about things on Sunday mornings) I was thinking. When exactly did the word "unfortunable" come to be in our family vocabulary? I knew that Emily had written it in an email to Thomas when he was in Hungary, so I went searching through old emails. It was fun reading through a few of them again. I had used the search feature, but the only "unfortunable" emails that came up were ones using the word, but not the original.

I found it finally, Emily had originally spelled it "unfortanable." So here it is, the genesis of a word, and a sincerely sweet message from a 3rd grade girl to her big brother.

June 12, 2005

"And now, a few words from Emily:

Well mom pretty much covered everything. I'm in down-town dance studio! Today in primary I had a girl in my class named Emily too! Her sister Jessica was in my class too, and they have younger siblings a little brother and sister . They're all from Palm Springs, California where they're was an earth quake! How unfortanable! The Chinese torists said hi to me . I'm rrunning out of things to say ! I love you ! Do good over there! Well I have to go to bed now! Good night! Oh wait!! Good morning! See ya ! Bye! Love ya! Bu bye!"

Also in this email, we sent Adam's address in Rancho Cucamonga, (he had slept through the earthquake), Marisa just left for Girl's State, Aunt Lynne stopped by with a bus load of Chinese tourists on their way to Yellowstone, and Kerry and I were getting ready to leave for our 25th anniversary trip to Maui.

A Righteous Battle

Since the new year began, we have been reading the daily message from Gordon B. Hinckley's book "Stand A Little Taller" before we say our bedtime prayer. Tonight Kerry asked me to read, and so I opened it up to see that the message for today was "A Righteous Battle."

"Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil," begins the scripture from Ephesians. The message from Pres. Hinckley tells us that "we are involved in an intense battle."

So far, most days the messages seem to pertain to what is going on, right now, in our family. These three have stood out in the past week -
January 6 (the day we went to the oncologist): Faith Overcomes
January 7 : The Power of Prayer
January 8 : Healing Power

I'm glad that I had the inspiration to look for this little book that Kerry gave me for Valentine's day in 2002, it's good to have a little daily dose of something that reminds us that there is no obstacle too great, no challenge too difficult, if we have faith.

The Starting Line

At the St. George Marathon in 2002, Thomas and I got off of the bus that drove us 26.2 miles out of town and dropped us off in the middle of nowhere. We were not going to be running together, because he was fast and I wasn't, but at the starting line, in all of the excitement and in the middle of 5000 other runners, just before the gun went off, he gave me a hug and said something like, "I love you mom, see you at the finish line!"

As I ran along at my 5 hour pace, I scanned every aid station I passed, just to make sure he wasn't there. I wasn't sure how well prepared he was for running a marathon, at the age of 16 and with his longest run ever being about 5 miles. I was incredibly relieved when I got close to town and saw the suburban, and he was in it, and he had the medal around his neck. It was actually better than finishing the race myself to see that he had made it safe and sound.

Today is a different sort of starting line for Thomas, and while I won't be running the same race, I will be cheering from the sidelines.

My Blue Italian Lake

To My Child

You are the trip I did not take,
You are the pearls I could not buy.
You are my blue Italian lake,
You are my piece of foreign sky.